Without a Compass Page 5

  Daryl shrugged, shoving his hands in his pockets. He and his sister turned back to regard Kai and Riley. “Might as well get it over and done with.”

  “Yeah,” said Riley tentatively. “I find it’s best to get sorted right away. Then you can relax.”

  Charlotte trilled a laugh. “Well, I doubt we have as much as you between four of us,” she said, fluttering her eyelashes. “But yes, after that long drive, it will be nice to get everything in order.”

  “You know Mum won’t be happy until we do,” agreed Daryl with a sigh.

  “Hey Kai,” said Charlotte. She lightly touched his elbow, even though she already had his attention. “Why don’t you come and help us? I’m sure Mummy is dying to say hello.”

  Immediately he was torn. He didn’t want Riley to think he was abandoning him, but he didn’t want to be rude either. He was going to be relying on other people a lot this holiday and he wanted to make sure he paid back his dues.

  “Um,” he said, glancing at Riley.

  He was smiling at him though, his eyes bright as he shook his head. “I’m fine,” he insisted, “I’m practically all done here. And my family will probably be here soon.”

  “Aren’t they here yet?” Charlotte raised her eyebrows. “I would have assumed they’d have left at the crack of dawn.”

  Riley shrugged and gave another look around.

  “They probably did, but there’s no sense in rushing.”

  “And I imagine Jake will need a couple of extra stops, won’t he?” Charlotte gave a fleeting touch to his arm as well and nodded sagely.

  Riley offered her a tight smile. “I couldn’t say, I’ve only had a few messages from them. They said they were close,” he added, glancing at Kai who nodded. “I guess they’re doing alright.”

  “That’s settled then,” Charlotte cried. She looped her arm through Kai’s and gave him a light tug. “We promise to bring him back in one piece.”

  “Or not,” Daryl added with a single flick of his eyebrow.

  Kai laughed and waved to Riley as he was led away. He’d be back soon enough, and Riley had insisted he was fine. He didn’t need to look after the smaller guy all the time.

  8

  Riley

  Life was infinitely better with tequila.

  Riley sighed, adjusted his sunglasses and took a sip of his fruity cocktail as he lounged in one of his folding chairs. He had his back to a certain Winnebago and that suited him just fine.

  Everything was set up just how he liked now. He’d jammed cheap plastic windmills and a wind chime into the ground by his feet, where they spun and tinkled happily. The tiny mirrors from the chime reflected sparkles all over his little patch. His clothes were neatly folded and his shoes in a line and his toiletries in their bag by his neatly made bed. He’d even parked Betty in a spot where he was happy to leave her for the rest of the week.

  Hence, he’d switched from beer to the good stuff.

  He took another sip of his alarmingly green drink and swirled the contents around with his straw. I won’t look over my shoulder, he told himself. He was better than that; he deserved better than that.

  Now that the first meeting with Darlottie and their dad was over and done with, they might leave him alone. Especially once his family arrived. He was sure the twins wouldn’t behave so brazenly snooty in front of his dad, because he was another leader. So as long as he didn’t find himself alone with them, he’d be fine.

  And it was good that Kai went off with them. That’s what Riley wanted. He couldn’t afford to spend too much time with his secret crush, or things could get mortifying, fast. Also, it might not be good for Kai to be seen as hanging around him too much anyway. He would hate to tarnish him by association.

  He sighed and scooped us some more salsa with a tortilla chip from the open bag on the table in front of him. He’d be a fool and a liar if he didn’t at least admit to himself that the hour he’d spent hanging out with Kai had been one of the most exciting things to ever happen in his short life. He was so much hotter in real life than he looked on social media, and he already looked pretty hot to Riley’s eye.

  He’d just have to treat it as a gift. He could collect little moments, like them unpacking together, and tuck them in his pocket to bring back to London with him to cherish.

  Besides, even if there weren’t any other moments, after their short interaction already today it wouldn’t be that weird for Riley to like an Instagram photo here and there. Maybe he’d make more of an effort to make Brendon’s birthday as well later in the year. He and Kai would be old friends by then.

  He rolled his eyes and shook his head at his own ludicrousness.

  It didn’t hurt to fantasise though. Like, about how Kai would need to take a shower sometime today or tomorrow. And wouldn’t it be just the coincidence if Riley happened to wander in at the same time.

  The tequila was obviously going to his head, but it was an innocent enough dalliance. Kai was unbearably gorgeous, there was no escaping that. Riley had gotten bolder as they’d worked, inching himself closer so that they occasionally touched. Every time had felt like an electric charge had surged through his body.

  It also didn’t hurt that Kai had that kind of manly scent that made his mouth water. Not like he wasn’t using enough deodorant, more like a warm, earthy musk that Riley wanted to bury his face in.

  There was nothing better than getting hot and sweaty with a guy. When he’d first started experimenting with sex he’d been overly concerned with always being clean and tidy for whoever he was with. And while certain areas needed to be well maintained, it was quite frankly exhilarating when you were so slippery you didn’t really know where you stopped and the other body began. Cologne was nice for the everyday, but when Riley went to bed, he wanted to know he was with a man.

  Despite being alone, he coughed and shifted in his seat, getting his cock under control. He was definitely going to have to tend to that situation tonight and he had little doubt about who would most likely pop up in his thoughts while he did.

  It wasn’t his usual practice to objectify someone he knew he would have to see the morning after. But he told himself if he kept it tasteful, he’d still be able to look Kai in the eye tomorrow. Maybe a good wank would get some of these feelings out of his system before they did any harm.

  Several more cars had parked up since he’d got to the camp. However, a new engine rumble finally announced the arrival of a familiar blue Ford Escort trundling up the track. Riley couldn’t help but cheer as he got to his feet and waved with both hands. A double toot of the horn answered him back. He downed the last mouthful of his homemade cocktail and started jogging over to meet his parents when they parked.

  Before he got very far, the car came to a halt and one of the back doors flew open.

  “Riley!” His younger brother Jake bellowed. He ran over the grass towards him, waving frantically.

  Riley stopped as Jake got closer, his face splitting into a ridiculous grin. “Hey bro!” he called back.

  Jake ambled to a halt in front of him, then threw his arms around Riley, crushing him in an affectionate hug. “Mum said you’d be here, but you don’t like camping, do you? So I said you wouldn’t be here but you are here.” He shook Riley, making him laugh, then let him go. “Wow! Look at all your stuff!”

  He bit his tongue between his teeth and pulled at his fingers as they walked back over to Riley’s camping space. “You like it?” Riley asked, giving his mum a hug as she approached. They both watched as Jake turned on the spot. He took in the colourful patio set and the blow-up double mattress inside the tent. It was piled with soft blankets and fluffy pillows. He gasped as he spotted Riley’s battered pile of board games he’d scavenged from a charity shop.

  “Guess Who!” Jake cried. He grabbed the box and shook the contents vigorously, making it rattle. “I love Guess Who, Riley, and Connect Four. They’re my favourites!”

  “I know,” said Riley. He nodded to his mum. He’d say hello
properly to her when Jake had absorbed the camp site a bit more. “I thought we could play them later.”

  “I’m going to beat you,” Jake said smugly as he carefully put the box back with the others and patted it gently.

  “Are you now?” Riley teased. “Hey look, did you see my lights?” He stepped away from his mum and touched one of the multi-coloured lights hanging from a string across the canopy entrance to his little tent. “They’re solar powered, so they get all their energy during the day, then at night they’ll glow and help keep the bugs away.”

  Jake blinked a couple of times as he regarded the lights for a moment. “Wow,” he enthused. “Wow Riley, that’s so cool. That’s so cool, you have the coolest things.”

  His lisp became more pronounced, but Riley just knew that meant he was excited. He offered his hand up for a high five. “You think so?”

  Their hands cracked together – he forgot how strong his little brother was these days – and beamed as Jake nodded. “Super cool.”

  Jake began rummaging through the tent, but Riley knew he’d be careful so he turned back to his mum to say hello.

  “This must have cost you a fortune,” she said by way of a greeting. She looked around at all his more unusual camping supplies. Hugging her belly, she bit her thumbnail and frowned. After the long drive, she was looking frazzled. Wisps of hair were escaping her ponytail and dark circles sat under her eyes. She only wore makeup on special occasions, but still, she looked paler than usual.

  Riley sighed. “Honestly, I got most of it off of eBay, Gumtree and the pound shop,” he assured her. “It’s pretty much all second hand or stuff that was on sale or that I had anyway.” He was telling the truth; he didn’t have the luxury of splurging on frivolous and unessential items. But he did want to have a bit of fun while he was away. Things like the fairy lights brought him a lot of joy for what they were.

  “I wish I had a mattress like this,” Jake piped up, grinning devilishly. He was lying on his back, swishing his arms over the covers like he was trying to make a snow angel.

  Their mum tutted, but also relaxed her shoulders. “Your bed roll is just as good as it’s always been,” she said.

  They were distracted from any more talk about money by the scrabbling of four paws on dry ground. Riley looked over to where his dad was pulling out one of the suitcases from the car, then down to the grass where a fat West Highland White terrier was doing her best to reach Riley on arthritic little legs.

  “Bee!” Riley shouted. He dropped to his knees and flung his arms out to embrace the family dog. “Oh who’s a good girl, Bia-Boo? You are, yes you are!” She scrambled into his lap and did her best to lick his face all over. Riley had learned long ago to keep his mouth shut when she said hello, unless he wanted to have his teeth cleaned by her slobbery tongue. “How was she on the drive?” he asked his mum.

  She nodded down at him, shielding her eyes from the sunshine. “She slept for most of it.”

  His mum was dressed in jeans that were worn at the knees and a t-shirt he swore she’d had for ten years. It made his heart ache a little, but the rest of his family didn’t really see the importance of clothes like he did. Besides, this wasn’t the kind of holiday where you got dressed up.

  Riley ruffled Bia’s fur and hugged her close to his chest as he stood up again. “Clever girl,” he said, kissing her head between her ears. “I wish I could have done that.”

  His dad was huffing and puffing his way over to them. He had two tent bags thrown over his shoulders. The suitcase he’d been pulling from the car bouncing along behind him as he tried to make the wheels roll over the uneven grass. “Hey Riley,” he said as he got close.

  His mum went over to relieve him of one of the tents. Riley carefully put Bia back on the ground to start sniffing his stack of disposable barbeques. He let his dad drop the rest of the bags down, then gave him a hug. “Happy birthday,” he said into his shoulder.

  Technically, his dad had had his birthday last month. But he loved these Scout retreats so much he’d told his family this was how he had wanted to celebrate. By getting them together for a holiday they could all afford, surrounded by the elements.

  Riley hadn’t complained once. Not a peep. But he had cursed and sulked by himself all the way through packing.

  Neither of his parents was particularly tall. Riley figured he must have got his extra few inches from one grandparent or another. So he had to bend down a bit to get his arms around his dad’s shoulders. Even so, there was an air about Phil Anderson that made most people feel calmer when he was around. He carried himself like a man who knew how to fix problems. It was probably why he’d been such a good Scout leader all these years.

  His dad clapped his back then pulled away, arms outstretched. “I am the birthday boy,” he exclaimed, making Jake cheer. He readjusted his glasses and rubbed his slightly rounded tummy. “Thank you so much for coming.”

  Riley felt embarrassed at the general air of consensus that he wouldn’t make it. “Of course,” he said earnestly. “The holiday is your present.”

  His dad arched an eyebrow at him. “It better be,” he warned. “I don’t need any things. I just want all you guys here.”

  Riley couldn’t help but smile gratefully. This trip cost less than his normal holiday, despite his aptitude for getting a good deal. But he’d fretted over getting his dad something special for his fiftieth birthday. “I might have got you a bottle of single malt scotch,” he admitted.

  That made his dad laugh. He always threw his head back when he did, not holding himself back. “I think I can maybe allow that,” he conceded. He whistled. “Look at you,” he said, taking in the work Riley had done to make his tent and the surrounding area more comfortable. “Getting into the swing of it already.”

  Riley beamed as his parents and brother inspected all his colourful knick-knacks. They didn’t comment on how frivolous half the things were. They seemed genuinely amused, even thrilled. The solar lights were a big hit, and his mum even said she’d like to copy his coffee table idea. “Makes it a bit cosy, doesn’t it,” she said, hugging the jam jar he insisted she take to her chest.

  Yes, it did make it cosy, thought Riley proudly. The Grinters could keep their state of the art Winnebago. To Riley, this felt like home.

  9

  Kai

  Kai wasn’t really sure what he was supposed to be doing, aside from sipping the exceptionally delicious fresh lemonade from the glass bottle he’d been handed. The only useful task he’d managed to accomplish since being cajoled over to the motor home by the twins was to help pull their bags from inside the vehicle’s vast boot, and now they were insisting on treating him like a guest.

  “Oh no, darling,” said Pamela when he tried to put his drink down and help with at least one of the tents. “You sit there and relax, you must have had quite a day.”

  It hadn’t really been that bad, but the twins were each putting up their own brand new tents with ruthless efficiency, and Kai wasn’t sure if they were silently racing each other to see who could finish first. Cameron was putting up his and Pamela’s master tent; it was so large it was more of a marquee. Pamela was obediently hovering by his side, passing him what he needed next without him having to ask.

  She was very neatly dressed in chocolate riding boots, cream slacks, peach blouse and a spotted neckerchief that left Kai with the inescapable impression that she’d probably make a rather scrummy dessert. She’d always made him a little flustered growing up in the same way his hockey coach Ms Ferguson had. Like she’d know how to administer a good spanking.

  Kai cleared his throat and shifted where he was sat on the steps of the motor home. His brain was all over the place today, honestly. One beer and he was having inappropriate thoughts about a married woman. It seemed harmless when he’d been a teenager, but now he’d had sex – a lot of sex – himself, it somehow felt like it could really happen.

  “Are you alright, dear?” Pamela asked. Her eyes travelled up and do
wn his body.

  Kai nodded, attempting to grasp his straw between his lips, but instead flicking lemonade up his face. Smooth. “Yep, thanks, Mrs G!” he said, wiping his chin.

  “Ha!” crowed Charlotte as she put the last peg in the ground for her tent. Daryl poked his tongue out at her as he sorted his last two. Charlotte blew him a smug kiss and Kai guessed it had been a race after all.

  As the lot of them took turns with the electric pump to inflate their air mattresses, Kai idly flicked open his phone. His battery was low after traveling all day and he wasn’t sure when he’d get to charge it again. There were probably power sockets in the reception lodge, but he’d feel awkward leaving his phone there for too long. Still, he might as well use it while he could. Especially as he appeared to have a lone, intermittent bar of signal.

  He didn’t get much time to look through things like Facebook, so it was a bit of a novelty for him to sit and nose through the app to see what his friends were up to. He chuckled at Brendon and Slady’s selfies from their drive so far today, and mused over his various other mates’ escapades. Some were at the gym, some were doing things with their kids, and there were the usual snap shots of people’s dinners and Saturday night outfits.

  Kai suddenly stopped when a familiar face rolled up on his newsfeed. He hadn’t even realised he and Riley were connected, but there he was, posing in the shirt he had been wearing this afternoon.

  ‘Beautiful view on the way to family holiday fun times!’ the caption read, which was exceedingly dorky. But Kai couldn’t help but grin, a warmth spreading through his chest.

  Without analysing too much why, he clicked onto his profile and started flicking back through old posts. Riley complained a lot about London transport, shared articles about LGBT issues, ranted about baking shows and posted inspirational puppies every Friday morning. Kai hoped it wasn’t creepy that he was looking through like he was, but he felt like this was filling in the gaps where Brendon’s brother had been absent these past few years.